The longest distance ....

Occasionally, the longest distance to travel is that between your ears. 

We can only achieve what the mind believes. 

Get your mind right.

Some of the time it takes a day of frustration to show you what you want. 

I've gotten my back in the right place. 

Where is yours? 

What have I gotten myself into!

A good bit of you might remember that I started attending Zumba a few weeks ago.  I go purely for the fun of it.  It is a workout that you get back what you put in.  So with each class, I put in more work.  On Tuesday, literally, there was sweat dripping from my nose.  Sorry Zumba ladies!  This girl doesn't perspire.  This girl sweats! 

Our regular class is for beginners and older individuals.  I joked which of those categories I belong in.  We all know that some people think if you are "closing in" on forty that you have a foot in the grave!  PISH POSH!  We laugh.  We chuckle.  We look at each other with bewilderment.  Like no one wants to admit they are having fun.  That we all look like fools.  Heck, I took Killer with me the other night.  She made it through 5 songs.  Pretty good! 

Well on Tuesday, we were asked if we would like to partake in a "special project" in class.  Wish I could tell you what the "special project" is but you'll see soon enough.  Being me and knowing that life is short ... of course I said "Heck yeah!"  Life is short and it should be fun.  In the past, I might just have shrunk along the wall and passed. 

So last night we all gathered for a meeting about the "special project".  Of course while we were there they made us "dance".  No biggee!  We do attend Zumba class so dancing is involved.  Well the meeting was held in a rec room that had mirrored wall.  I remember all three times in my life that mirrored walls were in place .... dance classes when I was little, fun house at an amusement park, and wedding dress shopping. 

Now I'm a pretty confident person.  I'm pretty comfortable with myself.  I'm pretty confident in my dancing abilities.  I'm pretty open to new experiences.  I'm pretty open to making a fool of myself. 

BUT last night, I came to an eye opening realization .....................

This is 500% right on the money!  OMG!  I could barely keep a straight face.  I actually went to my sedate down in the dumps face while dancing just to keep myself from busting out laughing!  I just needed the shirt, tutu, and boots!  OMG!  I laughed the whole way home! 

Those mirrors had to be old fun house mirrors!  Right?!  Don't disagree with me! 

WHAT HAVE I GOTTEN MYSELF INTO!? 

Keep an eye out for the "special project" ... it will be coming soon! 

A little soul searching ....

Good Tuesday morning!  It is far from bright and shiny here.  But I'll take it.  Rumbles of thunder.  Getting darker by the minute.  We nnneeeeddddd rain!  I've thought about doing a rain dance. 

Oh well, back to my blog post.  I don't know about you but every so often the philosophical side of me comes out.  I get a little deep.  I do some soul searching.  I become a little more enlightened .. whether it be about myself, others, or some thing in the universe.  My husband always tell me it seems to be when I get real with myself.  I don't know?  Maybe?!

Yesterday, I completed a 14.9 mile training run.  The time is inconsequential.  I had postponed it over the weekend as I had done last weekend.  So, I ran.  It was done.  I was happy.  It got me to thinking.  It got me to thinking about running.  It got me to thinking about me and running.  It got me to thinking about me, running, and my family.  It got me to thinking about me, running, my family, and just life in general. 

Through out my life, I've never enjoyed running.  Heck, I down right hated it.  Would avoid at all costs.  I was a member of the track team back in the day and would fight running.  At all costs!  My knees always hurt.  I would run for a few days.  Then stop.  To return, maybe, a year later?  But I found a system that works for me.  No real back to back runs.  I've watched my running form improve.  IMMENSELY!  I've watched my breathing improve.  IMMENSELY!  I've watched my body improve.  Notice there was not an IMMENSELY!  I like to think it has helped the inside IMMENSELY! 

Over the years, I lost toenails.  Had a calf strain....OMG!  Had hip issues.  Worried about my time per mile.  Not worried about my time per mile.  Ran 5ks'.  Ran 10ks's.  Ran a marathon.  But one thing I've noticed ... to be really honest ... to be really truthful ... to be quite frank ...

I don't love running! 

I love working out.  I love exercise.  Give me P90x.  Give me Body Pump.  Give me weight based exercises.  Give me a bike.  Give me a pool.  Give me dancing.  Give me body weight exercises.  Give me anything!  I'll bust my a@@.  I'll lift harder.  Go stronger.  Go longer.  Push more.  Than anyone out there. 

I don't love running! 

I like the sense of accomplishment.  I like listening to nature.  I like the race day atmosphere.  I like clearing my head.  I like using it as a little therapy....it is cheaper than shopping.  I like pounding out my problems.

Now, this all may be me getting a little down on myself.  I don't know.  I am registered for the Wineglass Marathon in Corning, NY on September 30, 2012.  I've been working hard.  I may not always blog.  I may not always post.  I may not always do a YIPPEE run.  There have been days lately where it seems like I'm always on a "computer" logging something....it is getting to me.  So, I've missed here and there. 

But I know in my heart of hearts that I've put in more work this year than I did last year.  BUT with that being said ... the same thing is starting to happen again.  My hubby seems to work a lot of overtime in the summer.  Weekdays and weekends.  Which makes long runs hard to fit in.  Really there is a difference between 3 mile runs and 15+  mile runs. 

I am all about making time for myself.  TRUST ME!  But it has gotten to the point that I advertised for a babysitter to watch my kids while I go run.  IDK?  I don't care for that.  I don't hire babysitters to go out.  I can't tell you the last time our children were left with a babysitter.  And with him working so much ... I am in charge of getting the kiddos here, there, and every where.  It makes me feel a little like this .........

I'm feeling a little inferior.  It makes me feel like I'm putting in an inferior effort.  I don't question myself very often.  I am not a self-doubt type of person.  But I'm starting to on this front.  Is the end justifiable?  IDK. 

So, I will run.  I will continue to train.  I will do the marathon on September 30, 2012 along with the 1/2 I'm registered for a few weeks earlier.  And after that IDK.  I'm gonna take a break.  Re-examine things.  Re-examine my goals. Re-examine what is important to me.  Re-examine if I'm really able to commit myself to this marathon thing at this time in my life.  IDK.  Maybe I need to pass on fall races.  Maybe I need to look at spring time races.  Just need to work it all out. 

Just feeling like an inferior runner who is also putting in an inferior effort.   

Enough already!

This morning I arose early in plans of doing a long run as part of my marathon training.  Well, my hubby had come home from work last night, slept for a few hours, and then was back out again early this morning.  So, my run was postponed.  That isn't what this post is about but that situation did directly contribute to my idea. 

Since the kiddos were asleep and I was awake ... well I tuned in some TV time.  I don't watch much cable/satellite TV.  Basically, if it isn't on NBC, CBS, ABC, or FOX this girl really doesn't watch it.  I listen more to TV than anything.  I flipped through our vast array on channels hitting on this and that.  Grabbing snip-its of shows that "read" interesting in their descriptions.  Yes, I'm up a little on my History channel viewing now.  Along with many other channels.  I didn't even know we had some of them. 

One thing that I noted was a OVER ABUNDANCE of weight loss commercials and exercise info-mercials.  I've been Nutri-Systemed.  I've been Jenny Craig'd.  I've been Slim-Fasted.  I've been some weight loss pilled.  Something called Sensa'd.  I've watched workout programs with God.  I've watched workout programs that promise unbelievable results in just 10 minutes a day....but in fine print at the bottom the 10 minute workouts should be stacked to get the best results making it about 30 to 60 minutes.  I've Hip Hop Ab'd.  I've Total Gym'd with Chuck Norris and Christy Brinkley.  I've Ab Lounged.  I've been ab swiveled ... don't remember the name but it looked ridiculous!  I've had bariatric surgery.  I've been told to wear this magic bracelet.  And the list could go on. 

It was like toy commercials at Christmas time on kids based channels.  I'VE HAD ENOUGH!  The fact is there is not a magic pill.  No magic potion.  No magic system.  No magic machine.  No magician to grant you that wish.  Sorry, but it takes work.  Does that suck to hear?  YEP!  Guess what .. you gotta burn more than you consume.  Just common sense.  You must find what works for you.  Every single one of us is different.  Every single one of us has a different body.  It is not one size fits all.  Trial and error.  Are you gonna lose 20 pounds in a month?  Most likely not but it is possible.  Are you going to have to give up some things you like?  More than likely.  Are you gonna be uncomfortable?  Yep.  Are you gonna feel like quitting?  Yep.  Are you gonna get down on yourself?  Yep.  Everyone does. 

I found it interesting that not one of these commercials talks about dealing with WHY?  Yes, we all know you need to move more and eat less.  It isn't rocket science.  But if you don't deal with the issues that made you get to where you are at ... it isn't gonna work.  They just show "dejected and depressed" looking people who are overweight and down on themselves.  Some times all by themselves watching "skinny" people doing fun things.  Because we all know if you are overweight life is a bitch.  You don't laugh.  You don't talk to people.  You might as well just lock yourself in a room and throw away the key!  But once they are "skinny" life is sunshine.  Fun.  Laughter.  Surrounded with "hot" guys and "hot" chicks.  OMG!

Seriously?!  Are there still people out there that believe this?  Guess what getting "skinny" doesn't fix your life.  Life is not going to automatically change to sunshine and rainbows.  Lollipops and unicorns are not going to show up on your door step.       

Gym memberships.  Exercise dvds.  Workout equipment.  Running shoes.  Walking shoes.  Any of those things.  Guess what?  In my eyes ... they all work.  I don't care how ridiculous the ab swivel thingy looked.  I don't care that the ole' gazelle machine was a little odd.  I don't care if you want to dance with God.  Take 10 minutes with Tony Horton.  Break out the bulky looking contraption of the Total Gym with Chuck Norris or Christy Brinkley.  If it makes you move your body .... YIPPEE!  Simple as that in my eyes.  You more than likely aren't gonna get "phenomenal results in 90 days" or "rock hard abs in just 10 minutes a day" but your moving!  And that is a start. 

As a little personal disclaimer ... I can not bash on the Total Gym.  My father bought one about 1 1/2 years ago.  He uses it.  Hasn't lost a pound.  Of course, there was no nutritional changes made.  But he does it.  Several times a week.  It gets him moving.  It makes him happy. 

Point is .... health and wellness doesn't come in a prepackaged meal, powder, pill, bracelet, shake (of any kind), or any other method that can be shipped to your house directly for three easy monthly payments of not $59.99, not $49.99 but only $39.99 or for monthly payments with 3 weeks free.

ENOUGH ALREADY! 

A little reintroduction......... (year old post with a few updates)

Good morning!  My thought is to do a little reintroduction of my blog.  My facebook page has many new followers and most of them don't know that I started out as a blog.  It has been since I don't know when that I completed a blog posting.  That is just unacceptable! 

LoveLaughSweatFuel was chosen for a specific reason.  Don't we all have a reason for naming our blogs or Facebook pages?!  Here is the breakdown .... 

1.  Love ... seriously shouldn't you do things that you love daily.  Surround yourself with people that you love.  Enjoy those that you love.  These are my "loves"............

My family.  Aka John (hubby), Muscles (my son), and Killer (my daughter)

I may love this group more than anything but I'm pretty blunt sometimes on the frustrations that come along with them.  Mainly the parenting aspect.  Really, you give me a manual for a toaster but WTH do you do with a child?!  I live in the world of complete reality.  Yes, I do believe that my children are wonderful human beings that I truly cherise.  BUT I also will admit quite frankly to the irritations, frustrations, and head-aches of having them.  And subscribe to the idea that if you say every single day with your children is "sunshine, rainbows, and lollipops" one of four things are happening .. 1.  you are lying, 2.  you are on some medication (prescribed or not), 3.  some one needs to check your water glass, or 4.  all the above. 

2.  Laugh ... life is too short!  Why be serious all the time?!  I try to find humor in a lot of things.  Yes, I'll admit to having a strange sense of humor.  I'm a pretty sarcastic person that, self admittedly, is hard to get to know.  And my sense of humor doesn't help out.  Some things just strike me funny!  My hubby and I laugh EVERY SINGLE DAY!  That is one of his strongest attributes.  He makes me laugh.  And we laugh at each other more than anything!  As we always say "We are such speds!"  I just wrote the word sped!  That was popular like 1985 .. I'm dating myself!  Here is an example of what makes me laugh........

Sorry!  Every single time I look at this picture ... well I laugh!  The good hard belly laugh. 

3.  Sweat .... it is good to break a sweat daily!  For me that isn't hard.  I sweat very easily.  Thinking about it makes me sweat!  Seriously, I've always done some type of exercise.  Even back in the day.  But, oh let me see, around 7 years ago.  Let's just say.  That I got.  Well a "spur up my ass".  And started moving.  This is the spur ...

My goodness!  The day this pic arrived on my computer ... I started my journey.  Apparently, the exercise I had been doing was doing enough.  So, I started walking.  No longer exercising but working out.  Hard.  Watching what I consumed.  Changing my habits.  And that led me to finally trying to run .. I believe I am still in the trying phase.  Then to P90X.  Body Pump.  Body Beast.  And whatever else may strike my fancy.  The sweating led me to this ... 

I consider this my "during" phase.  This is an outdated picture as right now I'm in the "fluffy" stage of a bulk which is seriously messing with my mind.  Trust the process.  Trust the process.  But there is about a 75 lbs. weight difference here.  My goal is to make myself the best me that I can be!  And I don't believe I'm there yet.  But those goals don't have to do with a number but more what I want.  Everyone has a "list".  That is a story for another day.   

 4.  Fuel ... this is my biggest struggle!  First off ...  I should admit for a very large portion of my life, I did not consume enough food.  And it got worse once I was a few years into my journey.  I know all about starvation.  Not intentional starvation.  But I found when I exercise a good bit .... well .... how about we just say .... there is no desire to eat.  I must force myself.  And since, I have started using myfitnesspal in order to track specifically calories in and out.  I feel much better and have noticed a difference. 

Some think that my view on food is a bit extreme.  IDK!  Maybe it is.  I grew up just like everyone else.  In a home with home cooked meal most of the time.  Packed my lunch daily for school.  Bought the popular products.  Ate what I believe was a healthy balance of things.  Well, I thought that until the "spur" showed up.  But then something kinda switched.  I started reading.  Watching documentaries.  Looking at things that I had never thought about.  Looking at things in a different light.  And well this is my idea on food very loosely ....

Yes, I feel that our food system is like one big science experiment and we are the lab rats.  There maybe times when I share some of my fuel ideas and they may bother you.  I don't know everything.  Heck, I barely know enough to get myself through.  But we all have our beliefs and they are all truly valid.  I stray every so often.  Heck, we are all human. 

So there I am in a very condensed little nutshell!  I am just a mom in "Littleville" trying to make her way through this messed up world.  Trying to show her children that we can accomplish anything and everything we want.  I am not an expert.  Nor trainer.  Nor dietitian.  I find motivation in many things.  What motivates me may not motivate you.  What inspires me may not inspire you.  

But if one moment of my "ebbs and flows" can show someone else out there that they are not alone .... well then hell .... I will feel like I've accomplished something in the grand scheme of things.  So, this little introduction may not give you a true sense of who I am but I hope helps.  Here I am ready to embark on my "blog world" journey again.  I hope to hear your comments, opinions, insights, and any thing in between!  And I always subscribe to the belief of .... if we all had the same opinion this would be one boring world! 

Give my little blog a chance.  My hopes is to make you think and laugh just every once in a while.  I don't want to be "too heavy"!