What a year can do? part III

Here we are March is over!  Wow!  Since I'm trying to be as honest as possible.  I really have to admit.  I have to admit that I'm tired of myself.  My feeling is that I've been "talkin' the talk but not walkin' the walk".  What do you think?  Some of you have been here for a little while and honestly ...

I've come the realization that tracking food, calories, fat, whatever is going to be necessary.  I'm looking at it like dusting.  I don't like to do it!  If you know me, you are fully aware of how true that statement is.  But I have to do it.  I'm not big #'s person.  I don't weigh myself very often.  Actually wrote last month that I would be discontinuing the weight measurement in this series.  But I'm not going to.  I have about 20 to 25 lbs. that I would like to lose.  I knew when I set out on this journey it would be difficult for this last bit. 

But I'm going to do it.  There is no but.  I want to be about 170 to 175 lbs.  Heck that is only about 16 pounds away!?!?!  I know what I want.  I know what I need to do.  Sometimes.  Sometimes.  Sometimes, I really think I'm afraid to put in the work.  I don't know why.  I've manned myself with some "food and activity" charts.  And intend on tracking every day starting tomorrow until the end of April.  That is my "self" challenge for the next month. 

I also did the pre test for the 200 squat challenge.  Without looking it up, I think the number was like 58.  I just remember the 50's.  I will complete that challenge.  It will start on Monday for me.  I plan to post my progress.  And by all means you can join along!  Go to twohundredsquats.com for more information.  They have a printable chart along with a download for those with mobile devices. 

So here are the numbers for the month........

February                                                        March
Neck  14 5/8                                                  14 5/8
Waist  38 1/2                                                 38 1/2
Arm   Left 14 3/4  Right 15                          14 3/4   15
Calf   Both were 16 1/2                                 Both are 16 1/2
Thigh  Left 24   Right 24 1/2                        24 1/4   24 3/4
Weight   186                                                 186

Hey, I didn't gain weight.  And measurements stayed basically the same.  I'm looking at it as a win!  I need something positive right now.  I've warned you before that my pictures SUCK!  You could scare mice away with them.  Here are some more!  This will be the last month with my NON-photographer of a husband taking pics.  He has been fired!  My Momma will be taking them from now on. 

This picture just scares me.  Really when will I get to the point of like my photos?  Does that ever happen? 

I know there are people against plastic surgery but I've seriously thought about removing my "double chin" once I reach my goal and maintain it for at least a year.  It is a family thing.  I think the WHOLE tree got hit with the double chin stick! 

It really is there.  I swear.  I can sit here and look in the mirror as I'm typing and there is definition.  There is a line.  But damned if it will show in a photo.  I've got 7 more months, right?  Oh, it will show. 

Ahhh, maybe you can see a little tricep action there.  I don't know. Maybe just wishful thinking.  Again, you can see it in the mirror or in person.  I'll get there. 

Don't be afraid of my pasty white calf muscle.  You would think I haven't seen the sun.  I have a major thing for calf muscles.  Sorry but a defined calf is just sexy.  I don't care if it is a man or woman!  The following is why my photographer was fired!  Damn it!  Take the pictures I want! 

Really!?  Why would I want a pic of my butt?  Seriously.  I'm just fed up with the service that I get! 

And who in the world wants a picture of the dogs back and my foot?!  Never have I wanted a picture of my foot?!  Dude!  You really need to take some photography classes. 

My goal for April is to see some real changes in the stats listed.  Log some serious miles.  Work on my squat challenge.  Ride my bike a few times.  Get working on a new workout program that I have coming.  And do this!  I've wasted 3 months.  At least I feel that way.  Please feel free to join the squat challenge!  And if you see me in person, please ask me how I'm doing.  I plan to share on my page my every day accomplishments.   

  

A strange THANK YOU ......

This week I came very close to being face to face with someone that I haven't been face to face with  since a nice November day in 2009.  On November 17, 2009 the sun was shining.  The day was great.  Now don't hold me to the exact time on the clock but I do believe it was 1:30 pm. Hadley and I were playing in the playroom, a glass sun room.  The glider that I purchased when Payne was born sitting in the corner.  I would sit there and read as she played while Payne was at school.  At 1:35 pm, my husband decided to lay down.  He was working midnights.  Hadley laid down with him.  I tucked them in, grabbed a drink, and started to sit on the couch.

The time was now 1:40 pm......when I saw the reflection in the TV.  The reflection of a car speeding over the hill and loosing control.  I turned and watched it rolling end over end.....into our playroom.  I will never forget that.  Heck, I'm starting to cry now.  I think about it each and every single time I sit in that spot on the couch.  It flipped end over end over end....hitting the corner with my chair.  Shooting it across the room....into many, many pieces.  The car landed on its roof.  I scrambled to get my husband.  Avoid the glass that flew all over the living room and kitchen.  While trying to call the authorities.  They asked if anyone was in the vehicle.  I couldn't tell.  I couldn't move.  No shoes and 1 1/2 inches of glass surrounding you doesn't work well.  The unnamed gentleman....I know his name and he lives a stones throw from my house.  Really under a mile!....jumped up and yelled "I'm good.  There is no one else in the car."  And off he ran. 
 

Now what happened after that doesn't matter.  Since that day, I've never come face to face with him.  Needless to say, it seems as if he avoids my husband and I like the plague.  He drives by.  We drive by his home.  I have wanted to stop many times.  I've heard that his children were pulled from school on that day so they would not be traumatized.  WHY?!  He wasn't here?  He ran.  He got caught quickly.  But no one asked about our children.  My son was at school.  And my daughter was nicely entertained by a very nice passerby.  At the time, I did write thank you to the two of them in our local paper.  Never did any one from that "camp" ever ask us anything.  Never heard a thing.

I'm not shocked by that at all.  I go from wanting to tell him he is a jackass to giving him a thank you.  I realized a lot that day about life and myself.  Life is short.  It can end in an instant.  I told my husband that I ALMOST came face to face with him earlier in the week.  He questioned what would I say.  I told him .... more than likely thank you.  Thank you for the realization that life is short.  That a mere 5 minutes earlier and all of our stories would be so different.  There is no doubt that I would have been seriously injured.  And my daughter would have been hurt.  I can only imagine what those that chased this gentleman down would have done then. 

So this strange THANK YOU goes out to you.....W*^^*!^ S%$#.  I thank you for making me realize how short life can be.  I thank you for making me realize that I must go after my dreams.  I thank you for making me realize that there are some pretty good people in this world....passerby....and some pretty shitty ones....you.  And I also thank you for avoiding me .... I more than likely would seriously have to fight the urge to punch you.  Thank you!      

Every so often.... (language)

We come across things sometime that move us.  That motivate us.  That drive us.  That might just simply irritate us.  Last week this picture arrived in an email............................

Now, I would like to take a moment and thank Brightroom for sending me this lovely picture.  This picture was taken at the 2011 Wineglass Marathon.  This was taken on the last bridge crossing in the race.  Between 1 and 1 1/2 miles from the finish.  At this point in the race, there were tears and SO MUCH PAIN.  When I look at this I remember the pain.  Trying to run down the slight grade.  Each strike of my feet feeling like thousands of needles jabbing the soles of my feet.  My eyes are watering now.  I can remember thinking ... the finish is around the corner and about 200 to 250 yards down the street.  you can do this.  you can keep going.  I remember getting to that corner and not being able to actually feel my feet or ankles because they had become so numb with pain.  Not a feeling that I enjoy while running.  The pain brought me to a walk....for about 10 seconds.  And then this kicked in ... Jen, what are you doing?  get your ass moving.  there is not a chance in hell that you are going to walk down this street.

If you notice in the picture my hands.  My hands.  That is all the more I could do with them.  You want to talk about swelling!  There wasn't a chance in this world that I was putting on my wedding ring after this.  Maybe that is what is wrong with the rest of the picture also.  Swelling.  I looked at this picture and wept.  Yes, some was remembering the pain and agony of the day.  But most was because of what I see.  I don't like what I see in this picture.  The neck and double chin.  Who takes a picture from that angle?!  That there my friends is heredity.  I can show you pictures of my family.  Immediate.  Extended.  And 90% of us, regardless of size, have that lovely double chin and "flappy" neck.  But everything else is me.  Not heredity.   

This picture moves me.  This picture irritates me.  This picture has made changes in life just over the past 4 days.  You see this picture has now taken center stage in my life.  It has been hung as a reminder.  Reminder of my past.  It now hangs beside this picture.....................

This picture prompted me to get my ass in gear.  With the results of loosing roughly 75 lbs.  It hangs on my fridge.  I see it every single day.  Every day it hangs there as a reminder of what could be.  It reminds me of how far I've traveled.  It reminds me of how hard I've worked.  It tells me "YOU AREN'T GOING BACK!"  Now the Wineglass picture hangs along side of it.  Prompting me with new motivation.  New irritation.  What will the end results be?  I don't know.  I am registered for the 2012 Wineglass Marathon.  There is one thing that I can guarantee.....my 2012 Wineglass picture will not look like that.

I'm ready to make the remainder of 2012 a full contact sport.  I'm here to tackle it! 

Bringing its' ass to the ground! 

My Momma....

My Momma.  My Momma .... Julia, better known as Julie. 

Johnny Appleseed 5K .... 2010.  She placed first in her age group. 

I've always been close to my Mom.  Some even remember that I kissed her each and every single day on my way out to get on the bus.  I didn't care who saw me.  Still don't.  My Momma has always exercised.  For that matter, my Dad did also.  I can remember spending a lot of time at the lake while they ran.  I can remember her running from our house to my grandparents more than once.  But, back to my story.  She is a lifetime member of Weight Watchers.  She is a walker.  She dabbles, every so often, in other forms of exercise but mainly a walker.  Basically, if I give something a shot ... she isn't that far behind. 

We started walking YEARS ago together.  Then in 2009, we had an urge to enter a 5K.  It was the Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving day.  We went to walk.  Only walk.  But when you;re with a group, the urge hits you at that start line.  She finished first in her age category that day.  We left knowing that running was going to happen the following year.  In 2010, I added a 10K to my list of things to do.  She went along with me.  Again, winning her age category.  Next race, Memorial Day 2010, winning her age category.  Do you see a trend?  Not to diminish her victories, but even she will tell you there are normally only one or two in her age group.

Turkey Trot 2010 ... I didn't feel like cropping the picture. 

Last year, my Brother and I signed up to for the Wineglass Marathon.  She had to do do something.  She signed up for the 1/2.  She set out with three goals .... 1.  Not die.  2.  Finish under 3 hours.  and 3.  Finish before my Brother and I ... we all knew that was going to happen.  Although, I was still out on the course, I hear she finished with a smile on her face. 

Me, my Baby Brother, and Momma

This year brings something new for her.  She is doing the full marathon.  In her exact words, "I'm going to be 63 years old why would I want to run a full marathon.  You know what?  I'm going to be 63 years old anyways."  Way to go Momma!  See, I think lurking under the calm and cool exterior is a person a little more driven and determined that everyone thinks.  My Momma has never let any ailments hold her back.  She definitely doesn't let her age hold her back. 

We exercise together a lot.  When we go, it is with the knowledge that we don't have to be together.  She does her thing.  I do mine.  That is what works for us.  If not she needs to speed up or I need to slow down.  Today, we went out together.  My goal was to stick with her.  When she jogged, I jogged.  Sorry Mom but it was slow.  Not really slow but slow for me.  My legs hurt.  But during that time we talked about her expectations for the Wineglass.  She said "I have 6 hours to finish.  If it takes me 5:59:59, I don't care.  I'm going to do my thing and enjoy myself.  And at the end of the day, I will be able to say I FINISHED A MARATHON.  And we know so many people that think they are not capable of walking a 5K.  I'm 63 years old and I can do anything I set my mind to."  She then chuckled to herself, looked at me, and said "Why didn't you just do your own thing?  Really, don't let me hold you back.  You have goals that you need to work towards."  Always worried about her kids. 

All in all, my Momma is my biggest cheerleader.  Always has been.  Always will be.  And you know what ...... it goes the other way also.  I only can hope to be running marathons at the age of 63!

Go MOMMA! 

   

Variety being the spice of life.....

Don't they say variety is the spice of life?  Thought I heard that one time or another.  I'm a fan of variety.  Music.  Clothes.  Hairstyles.  Hair color.  Nutrition.  Exercise.  Wait a minute?  Did I just say in exercise? 

Music ... yes.  I have everything from Garth Brooks to LMFAO on my Shuffle. 

Clothes ... yes.  To match my mood!  Been known to rock ballet flats and other days 5 inch stripper heels.   

Hairstyles ... yes.  Shorter the better!  Spiky.  Straight.  Outrageous.  Bald.  I've done it and will do it all again.

Hair color ... yes.  Have you seen a rainbow?  Purple = check.  Red = check.  Yellow = check.  Orange = double check.  Green = triple check.  Black = check.  Various blonde's = check.  And I'll do them all over again.  Well, maybe not black.  Even I had to admit that didn't work!  Did you notice one shade missing?  Blue.  That comes next week! 

Nutrition ... yes.  I love to try new things.  I love new recipes.  I love time consuming labored dinners.  I love to cook.  I love to try new ingredients.  My hubby would eat dirt on a plate if you served it to him.  That isn't entirely true.  He has admitted that there are several items that are served up regularly at functions that he doesn't like but eats because he doesn't want to hurt any ones feelings.  And my kids, well, they will try just about anything.  I really think they learn by example.  I've consumed some things that I very much dislike just so my kids would try them.  If you don't try, how can you make your kids try?! 

Exercise ... no.  Pretty much, I'm a P90X'er and runner.  I love the P90X.  I love weights.  I like running.  I'm not to the love stage yet.  Do you ever get there?  And you don't have to do the workouts in order if you don't want.  I have been following the schedule, as of late, and feel pretty good.  But I've been thinking about ordering Insanity and Les Mills Body Pump.  Actually, the order goes in tomorrow.  After talking to my hubby, after all he does make most of the $$.  I will only be ordering one of them.  After talking to him, he did bring up a good point.  I want a new bike.  And plan to attend yoga for a few classes and will be attending a local Zumba class for variety.  So, he asked why buy both now.  Why not wait on one until later in the year when the weather starts to change?  Heck, he is right.  So, I'm not going to tell which one I'm ordering.  When the package arrives, I'll share!  And I will be on the look-out for a new bike. 

Variety ... yes!  I plan to embrace you! 

So, do you have spice in your life?  

Do you embrace variety?       

Let's talk meditation.....

Meditation ... an enrichment to your soul. 

I read about meditation in several books.  I heard people talk about it.  And you know what?  What a bunch of crap!  Let me find my inner being.  Let me sit.  Calmly.  Chant.  And be one with the world around me.  Seriously?!  Who were those people trying to kid?  I'm a stay-at-home Mother of two kids.  Run my own business.  Why in the world would I want to sit Indian style on the floor and say "Uhmmmm".  Really?!  I would just be thinking .... I really need to sweep the floor.  Boy does my butt hurt.  This is killing my knees.  Will someone be able to help me up?

Then, I don't know, about 6 or 7 months ago.  I read about it again.  And this time.  And this time, I gave it a try.  I always read about people who mediate for 15 minutes to a 1/2 hour.  That say mantras.  This book said start with just 5 minutes.  I could manage 5 minutes.  So, I made a plan.  I would get out of bed.  Use the restroom....we have to have priorities.  And then sit down for my 5 minutes.  That first time, UGH!  Five minutes seemed like an eternity.  I struggled to clear my mind.  I didn't intend on chanting.  Just clearing my mind seemed like a chore enough.  No mantras for me!  Every day, it got easier. 

And in a ways, I felt calmer.  More peaceful.  Now a days, it is a daily ritual.  Well.....in February it slipped by the wayside.  Every morning.  Get up.  Make my bed.  Use the restroom....remember priorities.  Meditate.  Then workout.  I don't even know that my family is aware I do it.  Anywhere from 5 to 10 minutes works for me.  I always clear my mind.  I sometimes chant to myself.  Not necessarily out loud.  But it is always some thing that I need.  It may be "I am worthy".  Or "I am capable."  It really depends on the day and what is going on. 

It just brings me a sense of calmness.  Peace.  Relaxation.  And I feel ready to hit the day.  I can easily control my breathing, when running or working out, by going to that place in my mind.  Either from meditation or yoga, it works for me.  I have read about medical benefits.  Meditation strengthens the mind.  Makes it easier to concentrate.  Improvement in body luster and general health.  And many sports professionals use it. 

Here are just some of the benefits that I have read........

*  lowers oxygen consumption
* decreases your respiratory rate
* increases blood flow and slows heart rate
* decreases muscle tension and headaches
* can help to decrease blood pressure
* builds self-confidence
* reduces emotional distress
* and helps in post-operative healing

Those are just a few of the times that I've read. One thing that people need to realize it that mediation does not belong to any religion or culture.  So, I ask you ..... Do you meditate?  Have you ever thought about it?  It may not be for everyone.  But I don't think you would go wrong in giving it a try.